The Great Fortress

The other night a friend jokingly pointed out that I hate Valentine's Day and all things "romance."

Well it's kind of funny because I have been thinking about this over the last few weeks.  I've come to realize that it's not as though I hate or even dislike Valentine's Day it's that the romance that is associated with said day is kind of foreign to me.  I have been the recipient of very few romantic gestures.  I'm not saying this in a self pitying kind of way, but more as an observation.  

As time has gone on and my self-esteem has been put through the wringers I have been able to amass a great fortress around my pink little heart as a self preservation technique.  This is manifested through eye-rolling at the newly married couple that can't keep their hands off of each other or through the subtle nausea that creeps in whenever I hear my sister and brother-in-law call each other "Babe."

I am not afraid of falling in love with the "right person at the right time," what I am afraid of is that if he ever actually comes around it is going to be difficult for me to open up.  But I guess that's the name of the game as you get older, you are just one of the many emotionally stunted singles.  I try to remain positive but it's kind of hard because days, weeks, and now years are just passing.

So as much as I pretend I'm not affected by romance and crap like that, deep down I am just the same as any other girl and just wants to be just grabbed and kissed.  However, I am totally fine with never being serenaded by guy in a prince suit with a guitar.

My idea of Valentine's Day cards...do you get them?