Pooped

My life is up in the air...as usual.

I've realized over the last month that I have over extended myself emotionally and mentally which has been very exhausting.  I think the lesson I was supposed to learn is that I cannot do everything.  I have also been putting too much of myself into one sided relationships which is emotionally draining and has contributed to my burnout.  My father always told me that every relationship, romantic or platonic, has an emotional piggy bank.  For there to be a healthy balance each person needs to contribute 50%, but of course there are going to be times when one person gives more when the other can't.  So there are a few things that I need to work on to protect myself.

Last month I started a position in a firm at a lower than I would have hoped hourly wage for a 90 day trial period.  After that full benefits and a salary negotiation.  Positive aspects are that the office is low key, the hours are flexible, there is an office dog!, and I will be able to bring my future dog with me to work (which is my dream!).  Negatives are that it's not going to pay me anywhere close to what I am worth and the people are not exactly the most warm people in the world.  But I don't have to have a lot of money just as long as I am able to pay my bills and have the flexibility in schedule so that I am able to adapt to my future circumstances whatever they might be.

I was offered a position in another firm a couple days ago but it was for $15,500 less than I was making in NY.  Yes, I understand that this is not the same market.  But really?  $15.5k less and offering me the title of "Intern Architect" is borderline insulting.  As much as I like the principal of the firm and the other people that work there, I will not be taking that position.

I'm tired.  It's nearly 2:30 am, New Years Day.
Night.